Realigning your core values requires exploring both what is consciously important to you AND your societal conditioning. Your values, both conscious and subconscious, shape your decisions and motivate our behavior. If you find yourself feeling stuck, drained, or sabotaging what you say you want, it’s likely you have a subconscious values conflict. There are 5 values that I regularly find creating conflict within my high-achieving clients. They are responsibility, reliability, respect, achievement, and discipline. During a period of change, particularly societal change, it is both crucial and powerful to examen these driving forces within yourself. The patterns are more noticeable AND values work can ensure that you are living in alignment with what you want to create in your life and in the world, rather than sliding into reactivity.
In this episode of Unlimited, I explore a process for realigning your core values so you can make more intentional choices that honor who you want to be.
Some of what I talk about in this episode includes:
LINKS REFERENCED IN THIS EPISODE:
Fearing The Black Body: The Racial Origins of Fat Phobia
Stop Being Nice and Start Being Resilient
More Self-Control Is Not Always The Answer
About Me
Shift from Drained to Motivated
Free Exploration Session
If you found this episode helpful, please share it!
You can tag me on social: @unlimitedcoachval
Want to share your thoughts or have questions? Send me a message! I love to hear from you.
You can email me at valerie@valeriefriedlander.com or DM me on Instagram
CONNECT WITH VALERIE:
Facebook
Instagram
Get email updates!
Work with Valerie!
Realigning your core values requires exploring both what is consciously important to you AND your societal conditioning. Your values, both conscious and subconscious, shape your decisions and motivate our behavior. If you find yourself feeling stuck, drained, or sabotaging what you say you want, it’s likely you have a subconscious values conflict. There are 5 values that I regularly find creating conflict within my high-achieving clients. They are responsibility, reliability, respect, achievement, and discipline. During a period of change, particularly societal change, it is both crucial and powerful to examen these driving forces within yourself. The patterns are more noticeable AND values work can ensure that you are living in alignment with what you want to create in your life and in the world, rather than sliding into reactivity.
In this episode of Unlimited, I explore a process for realigning your core values so you can make more intentional choices that honor who you want to be.
Some of what I talk about in this episode includes:
LINKS REFERENCED IN THIS EPISODE:
Fearing The Black Body: The Racial Origins of Fat Phobia
Stop Being Nice and Start Being Resilient
More Self-Control Is Not Always The Answer
About Me
Shift from Drained to Motivated
Free Exploration Session
If you found this episode helpful, please share it!
You can tag me on social: @unlimitedcoachval
Want to share your thoughts or have questions? Send me a message! I love to hear from you.
You can email me at valerie@valeriefriedlander.com or DM me on Instagram
CONNECT WITH VALERIE:
Facebook
Instagram
Get email updates!
Work with Valerie!
Hello, my friends, and welcome to another episode of unlimited today, we are talking about realigning your core values, which is a repurposing of the episode. Shift from drained to motivated. From season two, I decided to bring this episode forward again for a few reasons. One is because it comes up frequently and has come up several times recently when talking about values, because values are so important. So I figured we should talk about it again. Another is because we are in a time of change, and that invites us to really look at our part, how we're leading in our own lives, and the impact we're having in the world in a time of change, that means values shifting. And I talk about this in my episode about societal change. And no, you're not crazy and really dig into the societal shift, but with a societal shift means that we're feeling it individually, and it is a really great opportunity to take a look at what's going on within us, because it is much more accessible when things are shifting, values are the driving force behind our actions. We don't do anything that doesn't align with some value that we have, whether we are conscious of those motivating values or not, and honestly, most of the time we're not conscious of them, because that's just how our brains work. We tend to function off of our brains, putting things into categories and then feeding us a charge, usually a hormone that relates to a feeling that then influences our behavior, and we usually have stories around all of those parts, but we're not necessarily conscious of the initial brain bucketing, and this is where stuck happens. The problem that comes up is that sometimes our subconscious condition values are running into our conscious, intentional values and creating resistance which blocks your ability to be expansive and show up fully, and of course, in alignment with what you say you believe in and what you say you want, gaining clarity around our layers of motivation can help with this. Can help with the stuck and also help with our alignment in how we are showing up. Exploration of values tends to be a big part of the work that I do with clients, and yes, even when they've already done values work, because often with values work, the focus has been on choosing conscious values, rather than on the relationship to their current values and current programming. Additional to that is that there's always more to explore as we go along. We have shifts, and we gain awareness pieces, and we make decisions, and so with that exploration, we have deeper layers to dig into, and there are questions that we may be asked that relate not just to our own belief system in individuals, but also to awarenesses around the societal norms that we swim in, just like you know that whole saying of the frog that passes the fish and says, Oh, the water is nice today. And the fish asks, What's water? It's hard to notice what's continuously being normalized around you, and yes, even when it's harmful to you, but especially when it's benefiting you and harmful to others, or benefiting you in some ways, even though it's harming you in some ways and harming others, it's a big mess, and in a time of change, is a great opportunity, as I said, to notice these things, because values are what motivate us. You can often notice them through the patterns in your life and through the patterns in society, but particularly how those play out in your own life, where you've internalized things. You do what you do for a reason. There's something that you're honoring, and that's why just saying stop it or just do this other thing instead doesn't work, because there's a reason that you're doing the thing in the first place. So if you can find the value that's motivating that thing, then you may be able to find a new way to honor that value that aligns better with the person that you want to be, the life that you want to live, and the way that you want to impact the world. So in this episode, I engage five core conditioned values that I have noticed that frequently come up over the years, including now, not just when this was initially recorded, but it still comes up. So I offer these in order to give you an example of unpack. And realigning your values relationship. The values that I'm talking about are responsibility, reliability, respect, achievement and discipline. We're also talking about differentiating between internalized values and intentional, conscious values. How to align your values with your desired way of being engaging values to improve the quality and sustainability of your motivation, and, of course, the values of Valerie Friedlander coaching and how they've shifted since I first recorded this episode, one key concern that comes up in this episode that I mention as a common undercurrent with the five values that I'm looking at is the fear of letting people down. I didn't address it in my original episode, and I won't go deeply into it here, but I do want to acknowledge that disappointment is an extremely difficult emotion. It's a feeling of loss, highlighting an uncomfortable or even painful gap between our expectations and reality. It is irrelevant if our expectations were reasonable or not, or if other people's expectations are reasonable or not. It's still there that emotion still goes off in a society with supremacist and authoritarian dynamics and a deficit of emotional awareness and regulation ability, disappointing others can quite literally, be dangerous. This fear is often internalized at a young age and is tied to the conditioning of certain values, including these five that I'm talking about, particularly for this reason, engaging yourself and these patterns with care, rather than shame, is critical to an ability to shift them in the way you show up to them, even when we've explored our values, deeper layers tied to these societal norms can still influence us, and it is essential to recognize These layers to create positive changes in our lives, if you're looking for support to shift draining patterns in your life, especially if you've dealt with things like toxic work environments or work environments that didn't have healthy balance for you, or any of these spaces that magnify the norms, let's chat. It really makes a difference to have someone who can help you dig in to go further than you realize. So if that's of interest, grab a free session. The link is in the show notes, and of course, it's on my website, and I would love to support you. So now, without further ado, let's get started. Hey there. I'm Valerie Friedlander, Certified Life business alignment coach, and this is unlimited. This podcast bridges the individual and the societal, scientific and spiritual, positive and negative, nerdy and no, there's just a lot of nerdy. Come on board. And let's unlock a life that's as badass as you are. What are values? They are the beliefs that you hold about what is important or desirable. They may not be conscious beliefs, but they are those internal driving forces that guide decisions that you make, they motivate you to do things you don't do anything without it being attached to some value, whether you are conscious of what value that is or not, everything that You do is motivated by a value that you hold. Sometimes, when you dig in, you realize that the value that you're honoring is not actually a value that you want to be honoring, or that you're not honoring it in a way that is helpful or that you would want to honor it. The sociological definition of value is an ideal or principle that determines what is correct, desirable or morally proper. Now, the study of sociology doesn't dictate what is a right value or a wrong value, or anything judgment about the value itself, but what it does do is study what a society holds is valuable, or what values motivate a society in a bigger scale, and where that might come from and why. Now that is not to say that that study is not problematic in some cases too, because obviously the ideas that get generated from that are the philosophizing or what gets studied and how it gets studied is often directed by the people who are in that space, in that society, and so what they choose to study, the way they choose to study it, what they choose to focus on, and what they believe about that, or what evidence they pull together about that. Belief is all influenced by those things, too. Now, if you have someone who is doing their work diligently, they will disclose their own awareness. But hey, not everybody is all that aware, as I mentioned in the intro to this episode, oftentimes we think we know more than we actually do, and when we have someone outside of ourselves engage and question and dig a little bit deeper, we realize that there's more there than we realized. This is very much evidenced in a lot of explorations, especially looking at and tying together works from previous eras in time that identify where people have made some really problematic connections and explanations for why certain things were considered morally proper, and the evidence behind that right now, one of the books that I'm reading is called fearing the black body the racial origins of fat phobia, and it really is highlighting a lot of those things, of how people, especially white men, have made assumptions and tied things together to emphasize a stratification of people and assessments of what is beautiful and all of that fun stuff. So it's just there's a lot of stuff there. But the reason I bring this up is not because we're going to dig too much into the sociological component of this, but to bring forward the awareness that we are influenced by the society we live in, you cannot help but be influenced by the values around you that motivate the society as a Whole, because it's like being in water. And whatever's in the water, you're going to take it into your body. You can't help that, because it's all around you in all of the components of society, the media you consume, the way we do school, the way we've learned a parent, all of these things get handed down, and we're just surrounded by it, so it's impossible to not be influenced by those things. And it's important to remember that, because while you may look at something as well, this is a good value, be careful of labeling things as good and bad, because they tend to box us in and then we tie it into well, this is good. That makes me a good person? No, let's not do that. That is where we get very rigid with understanding things, and inflexible with evolving and growing our awareness of ourselves and our participation in a society, our participation in our own lives, and we don't have the opportunity, or we don't give ourselves the opportunity to grow and learn. So digging into our values, and not just the ones that we think we hold, but the ones that we actually hold, the ones that get triggered when say, you get upset about something, or you notice something, you're focused on something, noticing what the motivation is, what is the value that is underlying that upset. We get upset when we feel like a value is threatened, whether we're the ones threatening it or whether somebody else is threatening it. Of course, this ties to emotional intelligence. It's great information about what is actually going on, so that you can engage it more consciously. So we're looking at primarily five values that come up a lot with clients. And we're going to start with responsibility. Now it sounds great to be responsible, and responsibility can be a great thing. Can be a very important thing. We want to take responsibility for our actions, for how we show up, how we engage, however it often gets misplaced. We end up taking responsibility for things that are not our responsibility. This is really kind of the undercurrent in codependency, taking responsibility for things that aren't actually our responsibility. You all know, I'm a word nerd, so I looked up the definition of responsibility, and it is the state or fact of being responsible, answerable or accountable for something within one's power, control or management. Now, women have often been targeted as being more responsible for things than we should be, or responsible for things that we aren't actually responsible for or not given responsibilities. So there's just, there's a lot of stuff within the idea of being responsible. What comes up for clients frequently, is around carrying their own weight. So one client in particular, she's like, I need to be able to carry my own weight. I don't want to be reliant upon other people. I want to be financially independent and not have to rely on other people. There's a fear around being frivolous and lazy, self involved, ignorant, of privilege and so that deep fear. Actually holding her in a place, in a workplace that was not healthy for her, she was afraid that by stepping into stay at home mom life, that she would be taking advantage of this privilege, and people would think that she was lazy and that she was not aware or conscious. She'd be like one of the housewives right on TV, and that was abhorrent to her. She really didn't want that. So oftentimes, when we look at values, we want to look at what is, what is underlying that value. And in this case, we look at, oh, there's a fear underlying that value the idea of responsibility. The focal point is on what it means to not be responsible. So looking at, well, if you are responsible, what are you? And as we explored that, she identified, well, it's it's being mindful. It's being aware of other people of your impact. It's being involved and participating in the world and doing things that matter. So when we create that switch, we put the focus on what we are doing, instead of trying to run away from the thing that we don't want. So this is that, that interesting piece of oftentimes, values that we hold, can have two sides. So it's not that responsibility, in and of itself, is an issue. It's how is it playing out in your life? How is it motivating you? Is the focal point on what happens if you aren't that, or is the focus on creating spaces and showing up responsibly, because that feels good. So when we identified those two things, like, what? What is responsibility? What does it mean? What are you afraid of? And it was like all of these things, lazy, self involved, all these negative labels, as it were, when we looked at what does showing up to that mean, it's a much more expansive experience. So sometimes, when we think about values shifting, the words that we use can make a difference, or at least really getting clear where we're focusing. Because where your focus goes, your energy flows. So, you know, we looked at like, Well, what happens if you aren't responsible? Besides these labels, and undercurrent to that was, well, you let people down, you let yourself down. You are not morally good. So how does that feel? We looked at like, where do you feel that? And it's like this pressure, this weight. When I think about being responsible, it's all the shoulds and the have tos and the weight of responsibility. And we switched the wording on that. We're like, Well, what about you know, if you think about being mindful, aware and involved, where are you focusing? What are you looking for? And it's, well, I'm looking for opportunities to be that? Where do opportunities feel when you think about seeking opportunity? Where do you feel that? And she said, it feels expansive in my chest, more open so the heaviness on my shoulders, and what it highlights is that difference between those shoulds and have tos and seeing choices and seeking what you want to create. So I use this example as there's that duality between what does it mean to be responsible and where is the focus? Is the focus on what happens if you aren't that and the dangers inherent therein? Or is the focus on how you want to engage and show up and leaning into the person that you would be if you are responsible. What does that look like? Where is your focus? Similarly, reliability is another one that comes up for clients. Now the definition for this one is the ability to be relied on or depended on as for accuracy, honesty or achievement. This has come up with several clients because, again, there is that fear of letting people down. Both of these have a focus in that often because they were let down, and they don't want to do that to other people. Being there for people, as we explored this, she identified, well, what does it mean to be reliable? It means I'm there for people. They can count on me. I say yes, but I don't like that. I say yes to everything, because I'm often saying no to myself in the process of saying yes to other people, and I'm not taking care of myself. This is so common. So this is where we differentiate again, with the words that we use and the meanings underlying them. Oftentimes we conflate reliability with being available. Reliability. Being reliable does not mean that you are always available. Mm. It means that people know what to expect from you. So naturally, of course, if you set up an expectation of always being available, then it may be threatened that value of reliability may be threatened when you aren't always available. So you may feel that discomfort and that sense that reliability is being threatened, but when you recognize that there's a difference, and you put intention around that, then you can set up structures to honor that ability to be reliable, be there for people, be counted upon in a way that does not take away from you. That doesn't mean always saying yes. Now there are various ways of doing this, and this one, especially, it ties to boundaries around being able to say, this is this is the expectation I want to be reliable. You can be reliably available at certain times, or you can be reliably available except for certain times. It really just depends on the dynamics of what you're doing. I know a lot of clients have set in their emails. I answer emails at these times. I am only available at these times. These are my hours. This is really important when it comes to entrepreneurship, because it can feel like you have to be on all the time, and if you miss something, then you miss something, and you've lost that opportunity. But if you are clear about the expectations, then you can attract to you people who are going to honor those and appreciate that they know what to expect from you, because you are reliable, because you show up to the expectations that you set, and that means that you're fully in control of those expectations, and instead of being controlled by other people and their desire for you to be available. So you see that difference between reliability and availability. But oftentimes those two get really conflated. And it's something that, again, it shows up in our society a lot, where, especially in these corporate spaces, anyone who's come out of corporate spaces or is currently in corporate spaces, there can be this expectation that you're always on, always be closing. Isn't that? Glengarry, Glen Ross very toxic, very unhealthy. So, knowing those differences, digging into those values, and really understanding what are they there for? What is the purpose of them? Are they things that you want to expand, and how could you expand them in a way that actually works for you and isn't taking away from the other things that are important to you? So like not saying yes all the time, but still being reliable. Another one is another R value. I don't know if this is a thing. No, there are some other ones coming up that that are not ours, but this one is respect. So the definition here esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability, or something considered as a manifestation of a personal quality or ability. So having respect for someone's ability or equality about them, their judgment or their creativity or whatever it also has another meaning that gets tied in, oftentimes in a very problematic way, is deference to a right privilege, privileged position, or someone or something considered to have certain rights or privileges, proper acceptance or courtesy. And this is where it's really an issue. And oftentimes it ties in in a way that we don't really think about if you follow any positive parenting practices, there is a lot of talk around how we talk to our children compared to how we talk to other adults in corporate when you're in a ladder dynamic which most corporations have, there is an expectation that you give more deference to people in higher rankings of authority. So, for example, I talk about this in my episode on tact, where I was told when I asked for a raise in a particular way that did not show sufficient deference or appreciation that I was not being appreciative and that I needed to Google tact because I handled that badly it didn't handle it with sufficient respect for the person that I was asking it from. So that doesn't mean that respect is necessarily problematic in and of itself, but looking underneath where the motivation is and where you use that word and how, because words have power. So these values have power, especially when the words and the values are tied together. So taking a look at is the word research. Respect, or the value respect being tied to the idea of being heard and acknowledged, or hearing and acknowledging another person and respecting their experience and them as a person, or is it related to following orders and doing what you should do, is it related to a positioning? Are you needing to be or are you afraid of what would happen if you are not deferential sufficiently to someone's status or position? Are you having an expectation that someone will behave in a particular way that is counter to your perceived status or position. So this ties to feeling like you're disrespected. I talk a lot again about this in the episode on tact, but it's really important to recognize if your value of respect is being threatened, and what it ties to? Is it that you don't feel like you're being heard, or is it related to a status or position? Or maybe it's both, sometimes that can play together. So noticing, how do you feel when this is threatened, this idea of respect, this value of respect, and how do you feel when it's honored, and noticing the dynamics of those things and where they tend to get triggered. Where do you tend to feel this is threatened? Where do you feel like it's being honored? And what are the dynamics of those situations, as mentioned in the second definition, it ties to privilege and so our societal context, especially in regards to this one, matters greatly in relation to where that's being triggered, because remember our emotions, our information about the way we're experiencing something, not necessarily the reality of the experience. So when you can acknowledge a societal value that's perpetuated, that you may have internalized. You can separate it from, oh, I'm a good or bad person, and go, Oh, this is something that I've taken in. I'm noticing what's going on in my body and the thoughts that are happening. And then I can separate it out and look at, how am I honoring my values, and how much is this a conscious value versus an internalized subconscious value. So you can show up more intentionally to this particular value that has so much problem in our society. Another one that has some duality to it is achievement, the value of achievement. Now I'm not defining this one because part of the problem with this particular value is in how you are defining it. And it's not so much about like, what does it mean to achieve? It's what are you acknowledging as having achieved? What do you notice? What do you say? Oh, I achieved something. What do you give attention to, to acknowledge this value? So what often happens is, when someone has a value of achievement, because we live in a society that is so focused on the outcome and in doing and going and creating and all of that, when we have a value around achievement, which is very common in this society. We don't actually give space to honoring that value, not in not achieving, but not in actually spending the time to acknowledge and honor what we achieved. We just jump to the next thing. What happens with that is that if you don't have anything where you actually acknowledge achievement, or the bar is so high to spend time acknowledging or celebrating, you're just chasing. You're just chasing. So it's kind of like if you think about values as being like cups. And I did a little social media post on this one the other day where it's like each value is like a cup. So when we think about filling our cup, it's not just one cup we're filling. It's these values and how we're honoring the values. That's part of how we fill our cup, or our cups, as it were. So what happens is, with this particular value, it's like somebody poked a hole in the bottom. So even when you pour into that cup, because you are achieving things you never take the time to acknowledge it. You're never actually filling the cup. So taking a moment of like what counts when you're thinking of achievement and actually defining what counts what gets acknowledged as being an achievement, and maybe creating some more options or opportunities to acknowledge that you have achieved something. It's that idea of celebrating, like every night you write down three things that you're celebrating, three things that you accomplished, that can be really helpful in actually plugging up that hole so that you're acknowledging that you achieve something you're honoring and. Intentionally honoring that value, spending time recognizing and celebrating those achievements. The fifth one is discipline. Discipline is challenging, and I actually talk a lot more about this one in the episode called more self control is not always the answer. I had a client who brought this forward, is not feeling disciplined enough, and that was part of the reason why she wasn't creating what she wanted. She wasn't where she wanted. She was beating herself up over not being disciplined enough, and this is something that she had been taught over the years and told that she just needed to be more disciplined, more consistent, and all of that sort of stuff. And when we look at the definition of discipline, you kind of automatically see where there's problems with that word and that value, and it is training to act in accordance with rules. Well, my question is, who's setting the rules? Whose rules are you acting in accordance with? Are they the rules that you set? Where did those rules come from. It's also additionally problematic in that part of the definition relates to pairing with punishment to correct or train someone to act in accordance with rules. Oh, my goodness. So I'm not going to spend too much time on this one, just because looking at that there may be a better word and recognizing when this one feels threatened, because often it's not necessarily that you're honoring this. This isn't like a conscious I feel good when I'm disciplined. It may be that I feel good when I follow through on my self care. I feel good when I do the thing that I said I wanted to do. Is that discipline. It could be you could bucket that in that value, but there might be a word that you could find, a value that you could draw in and emphasize that is a little bit more loving or supportive for the process of what you're doing and also when something happens and you need to be flexible and so discipline isn't the appropriate thing, because then we just naturally beat ourselves up. Because that's part of our value. Is beating ourselves up. Oh dear. So noticing that one and where that one shows up, because, again, it may not be a value that you are consciously holding. But when you look at where you feel bad about yourself, where you're beating yourself up, where you feel that value, when you feel like something's threatened, basically, or you're upset or frustrated or angry, look and see if that one's under there, because that one is one that shows up a lot, because it is how our society tends to teach you to act in accordance with the societal rules or the societal values, as it were. So just noticing that one is really important, I'm gonna touch on a couple other ones that are kind of in addition to because there's some things that people tend to come to me for when they're looking to do the work that I do, to help them create the life that they want to have. Those five are ones that are underlying, that are kind of sneaky beliefs, sneaky values that we need to look at and unpack. So I highlight those. There are a few others. One of them is freedom. So what does freedom mean to you? Like looking for that flexibility and freedom and fulfillment, those are like the three F's that people are often looking for when we work together. So looking at what does freedom mean to you? And oftentimes it's around being able to do what I want when I want to do it. So you might conflate that with flexibility, but it's not always the same thing. So actually looking at like, what is it? Maybe it's doing what I want when I want. But for example, my clients who have ADHD realizing that routine actually helps them do more of what they want. How important having a routine is. So just being able to do what I want when I want isn't actually helpful, doesn't actually create that feeling of freedom. And so while the process itself may seem more restrictive or rigid, it's being able to choose it. So that idea of freedom of choice. So I'm getting to define what the rules are. I'm getting to define what's important and what I focus on and when I focus, I'm defining my routine flexibility, as I mentioned, gets conflated there. What does that mean to you? Because it means different things to different people, and you may not realize that, but I had a client recently who was saying that that's what she wanted. She was afraid that taking this new job that seemed amazing would restrict her ability to have flexibility. So I said, Well, what does flexibility mean to you? And she said, time for myself and the ability to travel. So I was able to say, How true is it that you wouldn't be able to have that? She's like, well, I don't know. And so we dug into it, and it's like, well, actually there is flexibility in. This job because of some conversations, she will be most likely able to travel. And what does it look like to have time for yourself? What are the specifics of that? And how can we create that space just because you will have a job and not have whatever time you have now, without one doesn't mean that you couldn't fill that cup for what your needs are. For you, it just may look different. So what does that look like? Now for other people, it's the ability to be there when my kids have activities. So knowing what flexibility means then allows you to figure out ways to honor that value, instead of just assuming that you can't have that in certain situations or with certain dynamics. So we can find solutions when we know what the value is. Again, same thing with the idea of being fulfilled. Fulfillment being a value. What does that look like? What's true about what you're doing when you feel fulfilled. Where do you feel that feeling so being able to really understand and define it allows you to be more conscious in creating spaces to honor it and those conscious values, those ones that you think that you are looking for, the ones that you are intentionally going after it allows you to intentionally go after them, instead of feeling just because something happens or you have a particular circumstance in your life, you can't have that. There are often ways that we can find to create space to honor that value that maybe we didn't realize before, until we dug into what it actually meant, instead of just the subconscious idea of what it means and what the rules are around when we can have it and when we can't have it, just because we haven't had it in one space before doesn't mean that it can't exist there, just means that we haven't asked the right questions, or the questions that will help us find solutions to creating that doing this work to really clarify what your values are allows you then to intentionally create space to honor those values. And when you're faced with a difficult situation where you feel threatened in some spaces, allows you to go, Well, if I were true to this value, if I were honoring this value, how would I show up? What would that look like? Some of the values that have come up for clients, that have helped them stay centered in the face of adversity, in situations where they are uncertain, things like being open, being authentic, being brave, being vulnerable, being fun. Now not all of those will apply of one client that fun doesn't resonate at all with, but relaxation relates more so knowing what those values are so that you can intentionally pour into them and expand them, and sometimes even shift away from the ones that are more fear based and unconscious, building into the ones that are more conscious and intentional to the person that you want to be in, the life that you want to create. Jumping back in here with an update on this part of the episode where I talked about my business values, I believe it's always important when you are building something, to have some intentional values to check in with when it comes to what you're building. And sometimes those values shift, or the ones that you're emphasizing shift. Now, the last time that I shared this, I talked about sustainability, accessibility, simplicity and fun. Those are all still values that I hold. I have chosen more recently, when I did some of my own values exploration, as I'm building my business, to focus in on three different values. Not that these values aren't still important. They are. But I'm emphasizing these three as my primary focus, the first being integrity, being honest and accountable for the compassion at the heart of my coaching process to be sustainable, it must be paired with accountability to an honest and ethical foundation, curiosity, staying open to learning, because so many of our limits are internalized, societal lies, the practice of curiosity helps cultivate a mindset that allows for growth and change and humor, allowing space to laugh While tears are often part of the growth process. Sometimes laughter is the best medicine to create the spaciousness necessary to find creative solutions. If you go back and listen to the original episode where I break things down for those other values, you'll see that there is a lot of overlap. It is important, and I try and walk my talk with this to revisit your values and see how they're playing out, and if other focal points may emphasize better what you're looking to create. So this is a update for you on my company values. You can find them also on my website. You can also find on my website a link to schedule an exploration call. If this episode resonated and you'd like help digging into your own values, I'm here to support you and together, we can shift the patterns that are rooted in harmful societal dynamics, or are simply not serving you and maybe feeding feelings of frustration or self doubt, and instead create new patterns that are more authentically aligned and support your growth and life enjoyment. So if you want support with that, be sure to grab a free initial session through the link in the show notes or on my website. I would love to support you, and I will talk to you all next time. Thanks for listening. I so appreciate you being here. If you got something out of today's episode, please share it, leave me a review, take a screenshot and post it on social with a shout out to me. Send it to a friend or, you know, all of the above. Want to hang out more, join me on Instagram, or better yet, get on my mailing list to make sure you don't miss out on anything, and remember your possibilities are as unlimited as you are. Allow yourself to shine, my friend, the world needs your light. See you next time.